Happiness

I've been thinking a lot (okay, slightly obsessed) about happiness. I've had this nagging feeling that there has to be more. Yes, I'm happy: I have a pretty awesome husband, great kid, great job, house, etc. The list goes on. BUT THERE COULD BE MORE.

Is this wrong to think? Desire? I don't think so. I hope not, at least.

I watched Hector and the Search for Happiness last night, and I saw yet another example of the quest for happiness. His list in the movie is the following:

1. Making comparisons can spoil your happiness
2. Happiness often comes when least expected
3. Many people only see happiness in their future
4. Many people think happiness comes from having more power or more money
5. Sometimes happiness is not knowing the whole story
6. Happiness is a long walk in beautiful, unfamiliar mountains
7. It’s a mistake to think that happiness is the goal
8. Happiness is being with the people you love; unhappiness is being separated from the people you love
9. Happiness is knowing that your family lacks for nothing
10. Happiness is doing a job you love
11. Happiness is having a home and a garden of your own
12. It’s harder to be happy in a country run by bad people
13. Happiness is feeling useful to others
14. Happiness is to be loved for exactly who you are (People are kinder to a child who smiles)
15. Happiness comes when you feel truly alive
16. Happiness is knowing how to celebrate
17. Happiness is caring about the happiness of those you love
18. Happiness is not attaching too much importance to what other people think
19. The sun and the sea make everybody happy
20. Happiness is a certain way of seeing things
21. Rivalry poisons happiness
22. Women care more than men about making others happy
23. Happiness means making sure that those around you are happy

The biggest idea, however, that I took away from this movie (and also relates to the kid's movie Inside Out) is that happiness occurs when all the emotions are in play. When we are feared into action, recognize sadness that is and/or could be, and see the happiness right in front of us. It's the true, authentic living of life that brings about happiness. And that means feeling ALL the emotions that come with it. 

It's the feeling, I think, that's so hard for people. We all have become really good at numbing our feelings and experiences. We take excessive amount of pain pills, change our hormones so we don't have cramps or acne, pull out our phone and technology to "witness" the good, the bad, and the ugly. But do we ever just SIT with what is going on? Not share it, numb it, or anything else? Is this the secret to happiness? Being alive and experiencing everything there is to experience while being alive? I think it might be.

I'm reading a book entitled 10% Happier, by Dan Harris (I told you I'm obsessed with happiness), and so far it's an interesting read. He hasn't talked much about HOW to achieve happiness, but there are snippets here and there. 


One part I loved (and he was referencing someone else) was that he said our demons might have been kicked out of the house, but they are in the parking lot doing push ups. Brilliant. Why? Because it's so true. Our demons are never truly gone. They are always there, waiting to come back into the house if we let them. And I believe we let them by numbing ourselves or by taking the easy way. They are always going to be there unless we keep experiencing life and facing all the emotions we have (and valuing each and every one of them as an important and integral component to happiness). 

So there you go. Happiness and my pursuit of it, which, in a sense, is a fault in itself. I suppose I need to stop pursuing and just start living. Living my true, authentic life and embracing everything that comes with it.

Much love to you.